JULY 2025 Newsletter

Seasons of Widowhood:

The term “seasons of widowhood” was new to me, mentioned several months ago. It is true that we go through different phases. Emily, a podcaster, and certified Grief Recovery Institute graduate at Bravewidow.com, explains that she feels there are four seasons of widowhood. She describes the first season as devastation or survival mode. I’ll present on the other three in coming months. Emily@bravewidow.com

When you are a new widow, everything becomes new. It seems the same, yet different. You may feel devastated, overwhelmed, exhausted, unable to accomplish everyday things, even angry about the situation you are now facing. Or you may feel relief, finally free to make decisions or to finally move on. These are honest and normal feelings that can be experienced during the initial season of loss. In early widowhood, everything is decision-making and can seem overwhelming.

When you begin acknowledging goals and a plan of action, don’t be surprised by brain fog, normal during intense transitions. I became the sticky-note queen, with written reminders everywhere. In grief, a thought or memory is like that kick of a baby in the womb, distracting our thinking and pulling us inside ourselves. One of the hardest and most humbling things is coming to grips with your own weaknesses or inabilities. Reading through the Psalms and Proverbs became a hiding place for me. Although David was not a widow, in his writings, the Psalms, are recorded some of his most humbling moments. He became known as “someone after God’s own heart”.

You have probably been told not to make any major decisions within the first year of widowhood. Since we don’t hear that advice given to those who lose a child, a parent, or any other large losses, and although this advice is well-meaning, it can subtly undermine our decision-making and instill fear of change. Emily says, “You need a personal network and board of advisors for your life!” A board of advisors is not always in place early in our widowhood, but something we can encourage all women to develop. Proverbs 15:22 tells us with many advisers, plans succeed. Our times of decision-making can become a testimony of the goodness of God when we call on him for help.

Ps34:4 I sought the LORD, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.

BIBLE MEDITATION.

The Oxford Dictionary defines meditation as “a written or spoken discourse (communication or utterance) expressing considered thoughts on a subject.” Before reading what’s below, open your Bible to Ps 18:2-4 and read those verses. Write down what God speaks through those words. You will be blessed.

Meditation helps with memorization! Handwriting our Scripture and thoughts increases the memorization ( there’s something about action with words). This psalm was a song. Try singing it, which connects two different areas of your brain. Memorization helps hide the Word in our hearts. What is written in red is my meditation

Psalm 18:2-4 This psalm is credited to King David “when the Lord delivered him from the hand of all his enemies, and from the hand of Saul.” 2 Sam 2:1-4. What is in red are notes from my meditation.

GOD IS A ROCK

2 I love you, O LORD, my strength. David spoke to God as the One in charge.

my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, David could hide himself in God

my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. He trusted God’s protection DAVID STATES A FACT ABOUT GOD

3 I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised, He states the worship of God. and I am saved from my enemies. His enemies were mere men, ours are OUR thoughts.

DAVID FEELS OVERWHELMED

4 The cords of death encompassed me; we may feel that the death of spouse encompasses us

the torrents of destruction assailed me; our true enemy is the enemy of God

5 the cords of Sheol entangled me; we feel confused, trapped

the snares of death confronted me. God is sovereign over tests

DAVID ASKS FOR HELP

6 In my distress I called upon the LORD; He spoke out See Psalm 5:1-3

to my God I cried for help. Only God can help

From his temple he heard my voice, God listens for our cry

and my cry to him reached his ears. David knows God has heard and answered.

DAVID GIVES CREDIT TO GOD

Father God, please help my heart to seek you, to trust you as David did. Thank you for his words, now Your Word, which can comfort me in my times of distress. He sang this song in front of others, giving You the credit for his victory and salvation. Help me Lord to speak out to others of your victory in my life circumstance. David knew the battle, what the enemy looked like, the need for hiding and the need for help. Help me know when to fight and when to hide in You.

COOKING CORNER:

Not my. photo but you get the idea.

9”x11” breakfast casserole can feed 8-10 or can be divided into 10 freezer Ziplock’s and thrown into the freezer for your own use. Patriotic oatmeal casserole.

Ingredients:

3 cups steel cut oats; 5 cups milk; 3 eggs; ½ cup brown sugar; 1 ½ tsp baking powder; 1 ½ tsp cinnamon; 2 tsp vanilla; 3 cups frozen blue berries and cherries or strawberries; 1 large banana; ½ cup pecans, roughly chopped.

Instructions: Cook oatmeal (according to directions on container (DON’T USE WATER, USE MILK ABOVE). In a large bowl combine baking powder, cinnamon, and brown sugar. Stir in the cooked oatmeal. Blend eggs with vanilla and stir into oatmeal mixture. Spread oatmeal into 9x11 baking dish. Slice bananas and press with frozen berries into the top of the oatmeal. Sprinkle pecans on top.

Bake for 20-30 minutes @375 degrees (until bubbling). Eat warm or chill in fridge and serve later. Also good as a dessert with ice cream.

SERVICE OPPORTUNITIES: If you are active at a church or small group, you can invite a representative to come to speak about the Palmer Home for Children, a faith-based Christian organization that provides a family and community to children in need regardless of race, gender, or background. You could also share their video to increase awareness for the mission. You can call 855-672-5637 or mail Palmer Home Corporate, 800 Baldwin Road S., Lake Cormorant, MS 38641. You can also visit the home. https://palmerhome.org/get-involved/

INTERNATIONAL OPPORTUNITIES:

Namusoke is a 72 year old grandmother whose husband died in 2018 from Cancer. She supports one grandchild whose education cost is $75/term(three months). She struggles from body pains which can be paralyzing. She praises God for her life and support and fellowship she receives through Missionlink. Missionlink ministry provides an “Adopt A Widow” ministry. You can find more information at

https://www.missionlink.org/widows

AUTOMOTIVE TIP: windshield wipers. You Can Do This! Why should you need to know about windshield wipers? Here are four reasons: 1) for your own safety – to see well.

2) for your convenience – so you aren’t caught needing to do it in the rain or at night;

3) for financial savings – you can get the best price; and 4) for your own confidence – to make you a less vulnerable female! Here are some general tips.

• Blades for driver and passenger are often two different sizes.

• Different car models have different ways to install blades. Check your car manual for the type and size blades. If necessary, ask for help to get the right types and sizes.

• Check the condition of your blades for tears or cracking at least twice a year. Most blades need to be changed after 6 months. There’s a difference between winter and summer blades!

• To change the wipers: pull the arm assembly away from the window until it clicks into upright position. A piece of cardboard against the window ensures there’s no possibility of the wiper arm snapping back. Release the blade from the arm by either pressing the release button or lifting the release lever on the blade (some require use of flat head screwdriver), then slide the blade off. Some cars have a hook process.

• Put the new blade in the same way you took the old one out. Line the connector up with the wiper arm and slide the blade into place until it clicks. Replace GENTLY to window.

• Turn the car on, test the wipers using washer fluid. If no fluid, open the hood, find the cap with a picture of windshield wipers, open and pour in windshield fluid. You did it!

This month’s quote: “Give me courage. Please protect me. Let me live to walk in beauty.” Chester Nez praying in Code Talker, by Chester Nez and Judith Avila, Dutton Caliber Publisher, 2011.

Code Talker is the memoir of Chester Nez, Marine Private First Class aboard the transport ship on the way to Guadalcanal, November 4, 1942. His life story includes developing a Navajo secret code for the U.S. government battle against Japan. It is an example of personal integrity under stress, something we can all learn

This newsletter is a production of Widowhoodbook ministry www.widowhoodbook.org For further information contact M.Bruce, P.O.Box 4, Hernando MS, 38632 or email

maryrbruce@hotmail.com